


A Time For Us.

by espiritus



Series: We Are Legion [2]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Arranged Marriage, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Feels, Fluff and Angst, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Lanius is kind of a dick, Non-Graphic Smut, Sad Ending, Tragic Romance, all the feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-05-30
Packaged: 2019-10-08 22:31:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 14
Words: 17,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17394905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/espiritus/pseuds/espiritus
Summary: There are many pitfalls that beset humankind, the most insidious of which is love.Where last we left them, Caesar was under Arcade Gannon's knife while Ruby/Juliet awaited news of what had happened in that tent. And, while things seem fine initially, they soon take a turn for the worse, as love stories often do.(This probably won't make much sense if you haven't read the first half; you don't have to, but I hope you will, because this is now my favourite ship of all time and I've had so much fun helping these two wastes of space find each other!)





	1. Tabula Rasa.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, the fat lady ain't singin'... yet. 
> 
> Theme: [Love Exists](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHvGpxOMN6U) by Amy Lee.

Over the next few days, Ruby tried her best to keep busy with menial errands. Nearly a week had gone by without a single word from Caesar's tent, or anyone in it, and she was beginning to fear the worst.

Indeed, every day that passed without news brought with it a familiar sense of dread- the same anxiety from her childhood, of waiting almost a whole month for her parents to return from Vault 3 before Ambassador Crocker had informed her that they weren't coming home. She'd barely eaten since returning from Freeside, and what little sleep she got was fitful at best. Every time she closed her eyes, all she could see was that kiss- the one that she still hoped wasn't the last- and she'd welcome any news at this point, even if it was bad.

It wasn't until late one night, as the smoke from her cigarette wafted slowly skyward and the moon hung overhead like a pale omen, that Lucius approached her by the docks. "Juliet," he said, inclining his head in her direction. "Follow me."

Wordlessly, she did as she was told and followed him up the hill to the tent, bracing herself for what she might see on the other side of that door. The main antechamber was empty, but the inside of the back room was a sight to behold: the walls were covered in blood, and various surgical implements littered the floor; the Auto-Doc whirred quietly in the corner and, in the middle of all the chaos, was Caesar. His head was wrapped in blood-soaked bandages, and he lay so still that he looked dead... but, as they moved into the archway, he opened his eyes.

"Juliet, is that you? Or am I...?"

Ruby's mouth dropped open, her blue eyes filling with tears as relief flooded her senses. "It's me," she sighed, a sob pressed against her lips like a battering ram. "I'm here. I'm right here."

She wanted to run to him, but her legs felt as though they were made of lead. When she stepped forward, she stumbled and accidentally hit the dial on the radio atop the strategy table; it buzzed to life and, seconds later, the sounds of Radio New Vegas filled the tent.

"Reports out of Arizona quote Caesar as saying he's _never felt better_ after undergoing emergency brain surgery, and that he expects to resume his campaign of terror and mayhem as soon as he receives medical clearance. That's all I have for you this hour, and this is Mr. New Vegas, wishing you ladylike luck tonight."

"Never felt better, my ass," Caesar muttered, shaking his head at the radio. "Now, turn that shit off, and get over here."

Ruby hesitated, but Lucius gave her an encouraging tap on the shoulder as he nudged her forward. Once he was gone, she switched the radio off and crossed the room, taking a seat on the edge of the mattress. "So," she ventured, tucking one leg beneath her. "How are you feeling?"

Caesar blinked, then pointed at the bandages. "That's a stupid question, isn't it? Try letting a stranger dig around in your brain for a bit, and we'll see how you-"

As he said it, she pointed to her own scar- a jagged, pink ripple, covered only by a thin layer of fuzz, where two bullets to the head had left their mark. "You were saying?"

He didn't respond immediately, though he stared intently at the scar before reaching out to touch it. "I'm sorry, little one," he said, after a brief silence. "I don't mean to diminish what you've endured. If I could find a way to bring Benny back and kill him again- this time with my own hands- for what he did to you, I would."

Ruby nodded, then touched one of the bullets that hung around her neck on a makeshift chain, alongside a Legion coin, her platinum chip, and a ring that had belonged to her late mother. "Well, we match now," she said, with a weak laugh. "Ever since I got shot, there are days when it hurts to think and my eyes feel like they're being gouged out of my skull. If that happens, here's a little trick I use, to take the edge off."

With a dramatic flourish, she pulled a vial of Med-X out of her boot, and Caesar's eyes widened noticeably. "Okay," she said matter-of-factly. "I won't lie... This is gonna hurt at first. See, the needle's the easy part- the medicine itself kinda burns on the way in but, once you get past that, it's not so bad. Now, give me your arm, and squeeze my hand if you need to. Here goes."

She counted down from three before sticking the needle in, and Caesar gritted his teeth, to keep from crying out. She hadn’t been exaggerating: it burned horrendously- just as he imagined Graham had, after being set on fire- and he squeezed her hand so hard that he worried he might break her fingers. But, as promised, the pain soon dulled, replaced with a warmth that swept over his entire body like a blanket; he suddenly felt tired, as though he hadn't slept in days. and slumped back against the pillow with a groan reminiscent of a dying brahmin.

"Well, that could have been worse," he croaked, cupping her face in one hand. "As always, you're a lifesaver. And, as soon as I feel remotely human again, I'm going to fuck you so hard that you won't be able to walk afterward."

Ruby's facial expression shifted to one of confusion. "I can't tell if that's a pickup line or a threat soooooo... I'm gonna go."

She stood up to leave, but his hand closed around hers before she could even stand. "No," he commanded roughly, turning her insides to liquid fire. "Stay."

Once more, she obeyed, blowing out the candles on the nearby nightstand before curling up into the crook of his arm. She could feel his heartbeat beneath her head, in perfect rhythm with her own, as she drifted off to sleep- a comfort indeed, since it meant that they were both here and alive, a tangible reminder that nothing would ever come between them for as long as they both drew breath.


	2. Ad Astra Per Aspera.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just some fluffy fluffness; IDK how these two always manage to be so freakin' cute without even trying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _Ad astra per aspera_ : "To the stars, through difficulty."  
>  _Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre:_ "Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?"
> 
> Been dealing with a family emergency, so it's taken forever to get this up. Posting will be sporadic for a bit, but here's hoping everything will be back to normal soon.
> 
> Theme: [Stay Alive](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3HgWgNXTXhQ) by Hidden Citizens & Remmi.

In the weeks that followed, it was business as usual around The Fort. Caesar's recovery had been swift, or so it seemed, and a few of the Legionaries who recognized Ruby's contribution to it had begun paying her tribute, in the form of food and supplies. They left crates for her near Cottonwood Cove and, every few days, Lucullus would ferry her across the river to collect her rewards before she headed off into the wastes on whatever mission awaited.

But, in spite of it how quickly he had bounced back from the brink of death, Caesar still had a long road ahead of him. There were times when he couldn't function, due to pain or exhaustion, and he'd sleep for long periods while Lucius oversaw day-to-day operations; both advised Ruby against spending too much time in the tent, so as not to draw attention to herself, and so she began studying with the frumentarii. Nosing about in books wasn't as exciting as smashing things, but she quickly became a model student, if only for the sake of appearances.

Under Vulpes' watchful eye, she learned to read and write, and it was only when the sky grew dark that Ruby returned to the tent. She'd spend most nights sharing stories about her day or reading things she'd written with her newfound words, and Caesar was usually happy to listen. But, if he was tired or in pain, she would sit quietly by his side, replacing bandages or injecting Med-X as requested, until the sun came up; this particular night, however, was the former.

"Get this," Ruby said, clearing her throat as she swung open the tent flap and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Flavius taught me some new words today. _Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre._ Says it means _fuck the NCR_ , and that I should shout it from the top of Hoover Dam when we win."

Caesar rolled his eyes, suppressing a smirk. "That doesn't mean what you think it means, little one. Maybe don't ask Flavius for any more help with your lessons."

Ruby frowned at the doorway before dropping her eyes to the ground, as though she'd realized too late that the others were making fun of her. She had always known that being the only woman in the camp had set her apart, and so she had relied on Caesar's protection- the other legionaries were afraid of him, especially after what he'd done to Augustus, and they usually left her alone. But, now that he wasn't constantly watching over her shoulder, they'd become less concerned with repercussions and taken liberties with putting her in her place.

"You're kidding me," she huffed, throwing the book she'd been holding across the room before folding her arms across her chest. "Ugh, damn it all. I'm a fucking joke to them, aren't I? Just because I'm not good at all that book stuff."

She shook her head, utterly defeated, reminding Caesar of a starving puppy as he tried to think of an answer. There was such a thing as being too honest, and no nice way to comment on her lack of intelligence, but she had plenty of other, er, talents that made her a valuable ass...et. There had to be a way to get the message across, without sounding disingenuous.

"So what? Maybe you aren't good at book stuff, but I watched you beat the shit out of Augustus- a trained soldier twice your size- without batting an eye. I only intervened because you would have killed him, and death was kinder than what he deserved."

In response, Ruby just sighed. "I know," she replied, sounding not at all convinced. "I just wish I was smarter, like you and Lucius. Then, maybe the others wouldn't make fun of me, and I'd fit in around here, and-"

"I know," Caesar cut in, giving her an affectionate tap on the underside of her chin. "Believe me, I do. But the simple truth is, we can't all be me. If we were all so inclined, it wouldn't be Caesar's Legion: it'd be Everyone's Ragtag Band of Misfit Tribals; Lanius and Lucius would both be out of work, as would most everyone else here, because their unique skill sets are essential to the collective good. You already have gifts, and you'll learn to use them effectively in due course."

He knew she didn't buy it; the way her shoulders sagged and the corners of her mouth twitched just slightly downward as she rested her head in her hands made that much painfully clear. She may have been lacking in the brains department, but she wasn't stupid, and he didn't believe for a second that she wasn't onto him already. He'd underestimated her once, and he wasn't about to make the same mistake twice.

"Why should I believe that?" she asked, her head dropping forward in an admission of defeat. "How do I know that you're not just fucking with me too?"

Something about the way she said it bothered him. Maybe it was her tone, or the audible quiver that she'd tried and failed to disguise as a cough, but there was an edge in her words that hurt. "Don't you trust me, little one?"

She nodded, but not before he saw hesitation in her blue eyes. "I don't know," she responded slowly, as though she didn't believe her own words, even as she spoke them. "I want to. It's just that... well, I don't really trust anyone. Not after what the NCR did to my parents. But I'm not dead yet, so I must be doing something right."

"And yet, here you are."

When she didn't reply, he reached for her hand instead. And, though she bristled slightly, she didn't withdraw. "Listen to me, little one," he continued. "If there's one thing I've learned over the years, it's to keep your enemies close, but your friends closer. And, while you can't trust everyone, it's important that you do trust _some_ one- I have Lucius, of course, and I should hope that you return the favour, though I suspect you wouldn't be here if you didn't."

Again, Ruby was silent, though her eyes spoke volumes as they finally met his. "So," she ventured suspiciously, eyeing the door as though planning an escape attempt. "Let's say I do return the favour. That thing Flavius taught me... what does it really mean?"

Caesar suppressed a smirk. "It means, _is that a scroll in your toga, or are you happy to see me._ My guess is that he was hoping you'd make an ass of yourself, though whether out of jealousy or simply for his own amusement is unknown. But, since you asked, I'm always happy to see you, my dear."

At this, she perked up slightly and scooted closer, looking rather pleased with herself. "By the way," he added, as one arm moved around her waist. "You did well, little one. Your diction was flawless. And you tell Flavius that, if he keeps waving that red flag around, he's going to get the horns."


	3. Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ruby meets Lanius, and punches outside of her weight class. Results are mixed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ruby and Caesar have such a weird relationship, but the ickiness is part of its charm. :)
> 
> For those who have read my other works, Lanius' dialogue refers to Von (my SS from Fallout 4), who Ruby will likely meet at some point.
> 
> This one gets 2 themes: [We Will Rock You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ya5hb2F8gOM) by J2 & The Triple Killers, and [The Arena](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4MCjU-Du3eI) by Lindsey Stirling.

In the days that followed, Ruby continued her studies with the frumentarii. Since the previous incident, Caesar insisted on checking all of her work personally, and Flavius had suddenly become very afraid of her- perhaps he'd been given a warning by someone much higher up and, in the name of self-preservation, stopped making jokes at her expense.

As usual, she finished her lessons and, when it was dark, headed to the tent. But, as she opened the flap and stepped inside, she heard voices- she immediately recognized one of them as Caesar's, and the other was the guy who'd made the comment about the headaches that one time- Lanius, or something. She'd heard stories about him from the other Legionaries, who'd mentioned that his name meant _butcher_ and that he wasn't to be crossed, especially by a woman. But, where some might have been intimidated by such things, Ruby saw it as a challenge.

"What do you mean, give up Nelson?" she heard Caesar say. "I've invested far too much time and effort to simply hand it back over to those profligates at Forlorn Hope. Our presence there is a constant reminder that they're living on borrowed time and, once we make our move, they're done for."

He sounded irritated, but Lanius' voice was measured and calm. "We won't hold it," the Legate responded. "Dead Sea is as his name suggests, shot in the head by some sniper from the Commonwealth, and those resources would be better spent elsewhere. Instead of bothering with Nelson, find the girl and make her an offer... Or, if she refuses, kill her. There's no sense in guarding an empty safe."

After a few moments of silent observation, Ruby moved into the archway. Caesar noticed her first, motioning her forward, but Lanius- an imposing man, at least seven feet tall and dressed in a full suit of Centurion's armour- peered down at her disapprovingly from behind his mask. She couldn't see his face, but she somehow knew that he wasn't as fond of her.

"Crawl back under your rock, radroach. Little girls shouldn't concern themselves with grown men's affairs."

"I'm not a little girl," she sniped back, through gritted teeth. "Maybe I'm not big or tall, but I can kill just as good as you."

Lanius gave a cold laugh. "I've seen tumbleweeds more fearsome than you. So do your worst, profligate scum."

The arguing continued and, after a few minutes of listening to the back-and-forth between them, Caesar covered both ears, pain etched in every corner of his face. "ENOUGH!" he shouted, so loudly that the tent walls shook. "Go settle this in the arena. Or you can tear each other's throats out right here, as long as you do it quietly. But keep acting like degenerates, and I'll have you both crucified."

Ruby narrowed her eyes at Lanius. "Challenge accepted."

Before anyone could stop her, she spun on her heels and marched out of the tent to prepare for combat. Lanius followed suit, brandishing his blade at an unseen adversary before making his exit; by the time Lucius arrived, in response to the noise, the tent was once again empty, and Caesar shook his head guiltily.

"I'm going to miss that girl."

Lucius nodded. "Agreed. I've become somewhat accustomed to her face."

But something told Caesar that he hadn't seen the last of her just yet. He'd already sent Juliet to her death once, when she insisted on going to Nellis alone, and she'd emerged victorious- perhaps the same would hold true, for the predicament she'd find herself in, once the fighting started.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

As Ruby and Lanius readied themselves for battle, word of the upcoming bloodbath spread quickly through the camp. No woman had ever fought in the arena, and a crowd soon gathered, with the Legionaries betting on who they thought would win. Most sided with their Legate, though a handful put their caps and coins on _the profligate girl_ as a joke.

War drums beat as they entered, and Ruby breathed a sigh of relief as she heard the gate click shut behind her. She and Lanius walked to the centre, each armed only with a machete; per standard protocol, neither had been permitted to wear any armour, and they'd both been patted down by the Praetorians- to check for hidden weapons, of course- before entering. What their search had failed to turn up, however, was the vial of Med-X concealed in her undershirt, which she planned to use to her advantage. She'd never won a fight cleanly, and she wasn't about to start.

A gong sounded, signalling the start of the fight, and Ruby quickly took stock of her surroundings. It wasn't often that she planned battles- they just sort of happened around her. But she didn't usually punch this far outside of her weight class either: Lanius was bigger than she was, and he surpassed her in both experience and skill, which probably meant that he assumed he'd already won. But arrogance would ultimately be his downfall: it always was, where male opponents were concerned.

 _Never, ever let your guard down,_ she heard Caesar say, in the back of her mind. _Your enemies don't care that you're young, or small, or a woman. They only care that you're a threat. And you need to show them just how big of a threat you are._

They taunted each other for a few minutes, but it was Ruby who struck first- the move had been intended as a nuisance and wasn't enough to actually hurt him, though Lanius was none the wiser. He laughed and set down his weapon, swatting at her as she danced around his knees; here was her golden opportunity. She kicked the machete out of reach and darted between his legs; then, when he reached down to grab her, she leapt onto his back and wrapped her legs around his waist, jamming the vial of Med-X into his neck.

_The bigger the bozo, the harder he falls._

The vial fit easily into her closed fist and, from a distance, it probably looked to the crowd as though she had simply punched him in the neck. Of course, Lanius barely felt a thing, and he grabbed her by the arm, throwing her to the ground as she quickly rolled out of his footpath. It took a while for the chems to kick in but, once they did, the fight became incredibly one-sided: the Legate staggered around for a few minutes before dropping to the floor and, when a well-placed knee to the groin sent him falling forward, she threw a palm strike into his nose, which shattered on impact.

The gong sounded again, and members of the crowd started tossing a mix of coins and caps into the ring. Lanius groaned and keeled over, flopping onto his side like a dead mole rat while Ruby waved adorably at the crowd, blowing kisses as she collected her prizes. The fight now over, she exited the arena and dressed quickly before scanning the area for Caesar. She hadn't seen him in the audience, but she hoped that he would reward her antics with something more... personal.

"Juliet."

She finally spotted him near the clinic, Lucius at his side. But, instead of congratulating her, he simply jerked his thumb toward the top of the hill. 

"Tent. Now."

When they arrived at their destination, Lucius bid them farewell and Ruby followed Caesar into the tent. Once they were safely behind closed doors, he turned to look at her.

"So," he said, giving her a once-over before his eyes stopped at a bloody gash on her right arm. "You won the fight. But you violated arena rules, drugged my Legate, and embarrassed him in front of the others... Do you have any idea what you've done, young lady?"

Ruby nodded proudly, then puffed out her chest. "I'm alive, aren't I?"

"Indeed, you are," Caesar replied, watching the door carefully. "Lanius thinks he's invincible, but you showed him that he isn't. I don't know whether I should lash you to a cross or kiss you, for putting that pompous windbag in his place."

She perked up. "Do I get to choose?"

In response, he shook his head _no_ and slid one arm around her waist, closing the gap between them in one fluid motion before kissing her, hard. He lifted her up onto one of the nearby tables, and she didn't protest when he pulled her tunic past her hips, resting one hand on her inner thigh.

"You fought like a goddamned profligate out there. But you won't die like one. Not on my watch."

He pushed her knees apart and moved between them so that he rested comfortably between her thighs, just a breath away from her entrance. Ruby nodded, her entire body aching as her breath turned to fire inside her mouth. She wanted him to touch her in places too sacred to see daylight- places no one else would ever touch her again- and she submitted willingly to it... as well as what came after.


	4. Dulce Bellum Inexpertis.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ruby gets an interesting gift as a reward for her questionable arena performance. Also foreshadowing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Legion in this fic was heavily inspired by the Dothraki (from Game of Thrones), but Caesar reminds me of Tywin Lannister for some reason.
> 
> If you've read any of my other stuff, you'll notice that I often use dreams as a means of either foreshadowing or character development. Given the events leading up to this, it should be pretty obvious where things are headed.
> 
> Theme: [It Will Always Be You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6L6M93vTDE) by Eternal Eclipse & Merethe Soltvedt.

When Ruby woke, her whole body ached and the events of the past day- everything from the arena fight until now- were hazy, like she'd watched it all happen to someone else. Even Jet had never had that effect, and she wondered if the combination of heat and intense physical activity had contributed to the sun-drunk dizziness that made it hard to move.

She rolled out of bed and stretched like a cat as she rubbed the remnants of sleep from her eyes. Almost immediately, she spotted something shiny propped against the far wall and instinctively reached out to touch it- upon further inspection, it looked a lot like the mask Lanius had been wearing before their fight, only it was too big for his face. Sure, he was huge, but there was no way this thing would have fit him.

"Do you like it?"

The voice belonged to Caesar, who had appeared in the doorway behind her, one arm resting on the tent's frame. And, as Ruby turned to face him, confusion lingered in her blue eyes. "What's this?" she asked, gesturing to the shiny thing with one hand. "What is Lanius' mask doing in here?"

"No, no," Caesar replied, with a shake of his head. "It's not his. It's yours."

A moment of silence passed, and Ruby stared at him as though he had grown a third eye. "Wait, so... this thing is supposed to go on _my_ face? But it's so big!"

"Er, not quite. Here, I'll show you."

He moved her arms into position, then picked up the shiny thing and dropped it over her head before pointing at the nearby cabinet, and Ruby followed his outstretched arm until she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the glass. "Mars," he said, moving a strand of red hair from her eyes. "The god of war. You've probably learned about him in your classes with Vulpes, in which case it should be obvious why only you and Lanius are outfitted in his likeness. Wear it well, little one."

"Even though I drugged your Legate and broke a zillion rules?"

Caesar nodded. "Mars favours the bold, does he not?"

He tilted her chin upward, one thumb resting on her jawline, and Ruby felt her face grow hot where he'd touched it. The inside of her mouth burned, as though she'd swallowed fire, and she let out a shaky breath, melting into the ensuing kiss as though it were her first. 

"So, I guess that means you approve."

Ruby's lips gave an involuntary twitch upward. "What gave you that idea?"

Caesar was silent for a moment. His face gave nothing away, but his eyes seemed to smile even though his mouth didn't. "I'm glad you like it," he finally said, one hand resting on her cheek as the other drew her closer. "It suits you. And, if you promise you'll fight for me at the Dam, it's yours."

He kissed her forehead, and she leaned into the gesture, closing her eyes as she nodded her agreement. "I will."

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

_That night, Ruby had a dream. In it, she was five years old again, being escorted into the NCR embassy by a pair of armed soldiers, to identify her parents' bodies after the carnage at Vault 3. Nearby, two human-looking forms lay on slabs; they were draped in blankets but, unlike back then, she already knew what lay beneath._

_A much-younger Dennis Crocker sat at his desk, peering at her over a stack of paperwork. "Hello, Ruby. Are you ready to be a big, brave girl for me?"_

_Her head bobbed up and down, red curls slapping her cheeks, and the Ambassador put a hand on her shoulder as he steered her over to the bodies. She'd relived this moment many times, both in her sleep and during waking hours, though this would be the first time she'd done so without Jet to soften the blow. She knew exactly what she'd see on the other side of that blanket, but that knowledge never made it any easier._

_"Okay, sweetie," Crocker said. "I need you to tell me if you know who this is."_

_He peeled back the blue fabric, and Ruby gasped in horror. Instead of her parents' bodies, two new forms lay on the slabs- one was Caesar's, both eyes missing and a vial of Med-X sticking out of each empty socket. The second body was her own, completely naked but for a gaping wound that looked as though someone- or something- had ripped the still-beating heart from her chest._

_"Go on, darling. Who is it?"_

_The scent of blood hung in the air, mixed with gunpowder and burnt flesh, and her stomach churned violently as she fought the urge to vomit, choking down the bile that bubbled in her throat. The room was so cold that she shivered, the invisible noose around her neck tightening until she could no longer breathe; and, when she opened her mouth to scream, no sound came out._

"No. No. No. Please, no!"

The room was black as a grave, and Ruby sat bolt upright, sputtering as she gulped down several mouthfuls of air. Her panic roused Caesar, who sat up and lit a candle on the nightstand before lifting her into his arms, cradling her head against his chest. His embrace was familiar and safe, and she leaned into it, grateful that he'd had the foresight to ensure she could see him before touching her, since she probably would have clocked him in the nose if he hadn't. 

"Bad dream?"

She nodded, checking to make sure her heart was still where it ought to be, before forcing herself to look at his face. Mercifully, both eyes were still in their sockets, and she let out a sigh of relief, pressing her body to his for warmth as her breathing slowed to normal.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Ruby shook her head _no_ , still trying to process what she'd seen as she struggled to find sleep again. It obviously wasn't real, since he was here and alive and intact, but it had to mean something because she couldn't unsee it, no matter how she tried. And, though sleep did eventually come, the image of Caesar without his eyes was seared into her brain like a tattoo, where it would remain imprinted on her consciousness forever.


	5. Ignis Aurum Probat.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you thought for a second that these two were going to get a happy ending... LOL NOPE.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: Feels? What feels? You committed to killing Caesar, and it's right there in the tags. DO IT.  
> Also me: *sobs in a corner* 
> 
> I knew this was going to suck, but... ugh, I love these two assholes so much. :'( 
> 
> Theme: [ (I Just) Died In Your Arms](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ac4J9344s2s) by Hidden Citizens.

Thunderstorms in the desert were rare- so rare, in fact, that local legends claimed the Mojave hadn't seen rain since before the Great War, with some superstitious folks citing them as omens. And, though Ruby didn't put much stock in urban mythos, the brewing storm had caused some chaos around The Fort; there hadn't been time to make a run for Caesar's tent, and she was now crammed into the mess hall with fifty other Legionaries seeking shelter from the wind and rain.

"It's him!" Flavius exclaimed, pointing as a streak of yellow lightning stabbed the sky. "It's the Burned Man, come to kill us all!"

The children gasped in horror, though a few of the soldiers snickered and shook their heads. "Shut up, Flavius," someone piped up. "The Burned Man is just a story, made up to scare children and the slaves. You don't actually believe that, do you?"

"Of course _I_ don't. But I bet the profligate girl does. Hey, Juliet- is the Burned Man alive or dead?"

In response, Ruby took a sip of water and rolled her eyes as she glanced up from her tattered copy of _Pugilism Illustrated_. "Has anyone actually _seen_ him?"

"No. But we've never been to the Commonwealth either, and it's supposedly real. Makes me wonder why Caesar keeps you around- not for your brains, obviously."

The words were barely out of his mouth when Ruby responded by cracking him in the jaw with her canteen. It collided with his chin, causing blood to pour from his bottom lip like red rain; he pulled out a knife, but she was faster and disarmed him with a boot to the chest, knocking him flat on his ass.

" _That's_ why."

A loud crack of thunder boomed, shaking the ground beneath their feet as rain pelted the roof like a hail of bullets. Flavius, sensing that he'd been bested, backed off, and Ruby returned to her book. Before her arrival at The Fort, she had been barely literate and relied on pictures to help her understand things; now, she could now read and write complete sentences- nothing overly complex, but enough to get by without "help" from any of the others.

The wind howled outside as the storm intensified, radiation mixing with the rain to turn their surroundings the same, sickly green as the skies over Searchlight, and Ruby allowed herself to drift off to sleep as the world darkened around her. The next thing she knew, Lucius was shaking her awake, his face a mask of tension.

"Come with me," he whispered urgently, so as not to wake the other Legionaries sleeping on the ground in their makeshift shack. "Something's wrong. I need your help."

That got her attention. "What is it?"

Lucius grimaced. "There's no time," he said, pulling her to her feet before motioning for her to follow him. "I'll explain when we get there, but we have to go. _Now_."

He took off running toward Caesar's tent, and Ruby shook off the last vestiges of sleep as she gave chase. She'd never seen Lucius panic before, and her nerves turned to limp noodles as she followed him up the hill- if he'd been willing to brave the storm and its dangers, just to find her, something big was in the works.

When they arrived, Lucius took her by the hand and held on, perhaps a little too long, as he led her through the main antechamber. The tent was completely dark- the flames in their torches had been recently extinguished, but smoke still swirled overhead in lazy, grey tendrils, burning her eyes and throat as she drew closer. She looked to him for an explanation, but he simply held a finger to his lips as he guided her through the archway. And what she saw next nearly knocked the air clean out of her lungs.

"I found him like this," the guard admitted. "I don't know what happened, or who did it, but I figured you'd want to know about it just the same."

Caesar lay face-down on the ground, about two feet from the bed, bleeding profusely from a head wound. He looked dead, just as he had after his operation, and a lump formed in Ruby's throat as she knelt on the ground beside him. She pressed her ear against his chest and listened for a heartbeat, relieved to note that he still had one... but, when she switched on her Pip-Boy light to get a better look at his head injury, her efforts were rewarded with a groan and a cracking noise as the Pimp-Boy 3 Billion seemingly launched itself from her wrist and flew across the room.

"Fucking lights. Turn that piece of shit off. It burns."

Caught off-guard by the sudden change of pace, she leapt backward and staggered into Lucius, who looked equally confused as he was knocked to the ground. For a moment, they lay there in a tangled mess of limbs, and it took a few minutes to get their bearings back before struggling back to their feet. 

"Sir," Lucius ventured, motioning for Ruby to keep her mouth shut as he lifted Caesar off the ground and back into his bed. "You're, uh, awake. Are you okay?"

Caesar huffed, one hand still covering his eyes. "Do I _look_ okay to you? I thought that asshole doctor was supposed to make things better, not worse. Goddamned headaches."

A chill shot up Ruby's spine, and her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach as she recalled the nightmare she'd had. "No," she murmured, her voice trembling as she swallowed the urge to vomit. "That's not funny. Stop it."

Those words were the first she'd uttered since entering the tent and, judging by Caesar's reaction, it was painfully obvious that he hadn't known she was there. It was rare that anything she said or did elicited an emotional response from him, but this had, and it was written on his face.

"Juliet," he said, reaching blindly for her hand in the darkness. "I didn't know you were- I never meant for you to find out like this, and I'm sorry. But it's as I feared: we're out of time."

She could only shake her head in response, and her knees quaked beneath her, threatening to collapse. "But we did everything right," she croaked, her throat tightening as though an invisible noose were choking the life from her own body. "We fixed you then, and we'll fix you now. Lucius, get that doctor guy in here, quick!"

Caesar turned in her direction and, even though she couldn't see his eyes, fixed her with what she knew was a warning look. "Juliet, stop," he commanded, sounding both angry and tired at once. "That's not your decision, and you have no business giving my men orders. If this is what it takes to kill me, then so be it. It's been a damn good run. And I know you're mad, but-"

"Mad?" she snapped, wrenching her hand away as she turned back to Lucius. "Oh yeah, I'm mad. But at least I'm thinking clearly. One of us has to. So get the doctor in here, goddamnit; I'm only going to tell you once."

Lucius eyed her forlornly, like a sad puppy whose owner had abandoned him, but obeyed. She watched him leave, head held high, even as her entire body trembled beneath the weight of her grief. Caesar sighed, in both frustration and defeat- it sounded more like a sob than a sigh. And, to Ruby, it was the saddest sound in the world.

"Juliet, please... Look at me."

Caesar wasn't used to begging anyone for anything- he took what he wanted, and that was the end of it. But Juliet was stubborn, prickly as a cactus and twice as tough; not smart, but somehow hardened, beyond her twenty-ish years, She'd keep her spikes up until she no longer felt threatened or someone ripped them off, and it seemed that anger was the only way to reach her, provoke her into breaking her self-imposed vow of silence.

"Mark my words, you piece of shit: I'm not dead yet, and it's one thing to go around commanding my men like they're your own personal entourage, but this is the first and last time you'll ever disobey a direct order. So you can do as I say, or get the fuck out... but, if you walk out that door, I'll have you hunted down and crucified like the profligate you are."

"Fine," she challenged, her brave facade faltering as a sob seeped into her voice. "Do it. I might even consider it a favour."

Her pretty face crumpled, and she toppled to the floor like a sack of produce. Caesar watched her for a moment, then gritted his teeth and forced himself to stand- his head still spun, and he was a bit unsteady on his feet, but he was able to reach her before his left leg gave out. He gathered her in his arms and held her, crushing her body against his so hard that she couldn't escape if she tried- which she did, several times. But he didn't release his grip, even when she nearly broke his nose with the back of her head.

"I get it," he said finally. "You're angry. You have every right to be. And, if you want to walk away now- go back home to Freeside, and pretend you were never here- that's your choice, and I won't stop you. Maybe it's better this way."

Ruby said nothing, biting down on her bottom lip until it bled, but shook her head and slumped against his chest. Her breathing quickened, and she let out a sob that, thankfully, was drowned out by a thunderclap as the storm outside raged on. A few minutes later, she peered up at him- her blue eyes were puffy and bloodshot, and she looked so thoroughly broken, a lost child made old before her time. He touched her cheek again, and she allowed it, but his right hand came away slick with tears.

"No," she croaked, her voice still raw from crying. "I'm not leaving. I'm going to fix you. Or that doctor guy will. I don't care who I have to kill, to make it happen, and God help anyone who gets in my way."

Her eyes sparkled with sad determination, and she pulled herself off the floor before helping him do the same. Once he was safely back in bed, she poked her head out of the tent and scanned the camp for Lucius. He was headed up the hill with two other guards, one of whom was covered in blood, and her stomach filled with cazador eggs as she waited for him to speak. She needed good news, some Jet... maybe both. Anything that didn't involve the only person she'd ever cared about dying.

"Juliet," Lucius called out, bracing against a nearby pole as his shoes sank deeper into the mud. "Don't shoot the messenger, but Arcade, the doctor... He's dead."


	6. Memento Mori.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember how well Ruby and Lanius got along in chapter 3? Yeah, about that...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In a traditional Roman wedding, all arrangements were made by the bride's father, who would pass the metaphorical torch to her husband. Ruby's parents are dead, of course, so our lord and saviour the Kaiser Roll has taken the place of her father (which makes their relationship even more creepy, but hey, whatever).
> 
>  _Quando tu Gaius, ego Gaia_ : "where/when you are Gaius, I am Gaia."
> 
> The exact significance of this phrase, spoken by Roman brides during the vows, is unknown, though the names Gaius (masc.) and Gaia (fem.) were thought to be associated with good luck.
> 
> Theme: [Casualty](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsYP1VjOSX8) by Hidden Citizens & Quinn Lewis.

In the days that followed, Caesar's condition rapidly deteriorated. He slept most of the day, could no longer walk, and had started refusing food; with his personal physician now dead, things looked bleak, and all anyone could do was make him as comfortable as possible, in preparation for the next life stage- death.

Naturally, chaos and upheaval accompanied the change. Lucius assumed control of The Fort, and Lanius remained in charge of planning the assault on Hoover Dam, until such time as he would take complete power, though the chain of command was loosening by the minute. Lanius' supporters clashed brutally with those loyal to Caesar, and the widening schism soon led to skirmishes and infighting as the Legion threatened to tear itself apart.

For her part, Ruby had avoided getting involved, instead devoting herself almost completely to her studies. Despite her protests, Caesar had insisted that she continue her lessons with Vulpes- he was adamant that she didn't need to see him in his current state and that her work would provide a distraction from the inevitable. On this particular day, however, she arrived at the training camp to find Lucius waiting for her.

"Come," he said, motioning for her to follow him. "The Caesar requests your presence in his tent, and he's asked that you wear _this_."

He handed her a silk cloak- Legion red with gold trim- and turned around as she ducked into one of the tents to change. She draped it over her body, the soft fabric clinging to her skin in the heat as she rejoined Lucius for the walk back to the tent. She'd made this trip many times, and yet the road felt longer than ever; the sand beneath her feet burned, but she tried to focus on the pain, instead of thinking about what she'd see once they'd made it to their destination.

As they approached the tent, they were met by a pair of Praetorians who, upon seeing Lucius, waved them inside- with all the fighting going on, the tent was heavily guarded and access restricted to a select few named by Caesar himself. It was much cooler and darker there, though Caesar's throne was vacant- his absence felt wrong, and Ruby shuddered at the realization that there would soon come a time when he wouldn't be just a room away.

When she entered, Lanius was already there. She'd forgotten how tall he was, and standing next to him made her feel like a mole rat beside a deathclaw. She only came up to his waist, and one of his hands was the size of her head; she almost grinned with pride as she recalled their last meeting, though that feeling soon died away as she caught a glimpse of Caesar in his bed. He'd been so proud of her then, and it felt like half a century had passed since the night they'd _celebrated_ her victory on that table in the main antechamber.

"Welcome," he said, pulling himself upright in bed, by way of greeting. "Lanius, Juliet... I trust that both of you know why you're here."

Lanius nodded, and Ruby followed his lead, even though she had no idea. "Very well," Caesar continued. "As we're all aware, I won't be here forever. I don't know how long I've got but, in my absence, I expect that both of you will guide my Legion to greatness; I know you two got off on the wrong foot during your last meeting, but I need you both to bury the proverbial hatchet and show the others a united front."

_Where's he going with this?_

"As for what that means," Caesar continued, his eyes moving back and forth between them. "Lanius will soon be in charge of all the Legion's affairs. And you, Juliet, will be his right hand- bear his children, counsel him on important matters. And the men here will obey your commands, just as they do his. I know this is all very sudden, but we don't have much time. I've written a short speech for each of you, so please, take a few moments to prepare yourselves."

A soldier to the core, Lanius accepted his orders and walked out, past Lucius and outside. The guard also took his cue to exit and, as soon as he was gone, Ruby wasted no time expressing her displeasure at the arrangement that had just unfolded.

"No," she said, vehemently shaking her head as she crossed her arms. "I'm not marrying him. You can't make me."

"Yes, I can," Caesar replied simply. "And, believe me, Juliet, it's for your own good. This was never how it was supposed to end, but it's the only way to ensure your safety once I'm gone. Once you say your vows, no one can touch you. And I know you don't understand it now, but you will, in time."

He touched her cheek with one hand, and she flinched in response, but did not withdraw. "Be brave, little one," he added, his voice breaking just slightly as he brushed a tear from her face. "Please... if not for yourself, then for me."

Too numb to speak, Ruby nodded mechanically, her face fever-red and hot as the sun, wet with tears that spilled down her cheeks faster than he could wipe them away. Truthfully, she'd rather slit her own throat than go through with this, since there was no telling what unspeakable things Lanius would do to her, once she was his. But Caesar's will was indomitable and absolute; if he believed this to be the only option, then so it was.

A few moments later, Lanius returned, Lucius at his side, and took his place across from Ruby. She, of course, refused to look at any of them and kept her gaze glued to the floor, even as she spoke the words that would seal her fate.

"Quando tu Gaius, ego Gaia."

As she said it, she looked up just long enough that Caesar saw the fear in her eyes. She reminded him of a wild dog, cornered and frightened, and it crushed him in every conceivable way; he wanted to go to her, hold her and tell her that the whole thing was a sick joke. But his damn legs just wouldn't budge and, besides, it was too late for that now. Instead, he watched helplessly as Lanius dragged her off to another tent, where they would consummate their marriage.

_It should have been me._

The newlyweds' tent wasn't far from his own, meaning that Juliet- _his_ Juliet- was mere feet away. He could hear her sobbing as Lanius did only god-knows-what, and he wished that he could walk again, if only long enough to storm in there and pull that asshole off of her. She didn't deserve any of it, and he had done everything in his power to spare her this end. But they'd run out of time, and all other contingencies had been exhausted... hadn't they? 

"No! Stop! Don't touch- no, please, no!"

He closed his eyes and squeezed them tightly shut, covering his ears to block out the screams that pierced his skull. Everything leading up to this point had gone according to plan and, still, he had failed: the Republic would come with their torches and pitchforks and, without his guidance, the leaderless Legionaries would scatter like dust; everything he'd built would be overrun, and Juliet... She'd be taken prisoner by Oliver and his goons, or worse. But perhaps that would be a mercy, compared to her current circumstances.

"No, no.... Please... no!"

_No. Stop it. Get off her._

She screamed horribly, the sound grinding into Caesar's brain. He tried to stand up, but couldn't; on the second attempt, he made it to his feet, but his legs wouldn't work and he tumbled to the floor, punching the ground in frustrated defeat. How perversely ironic that he, the mighty Caesar, conqueror of eighty-six tribes, would end his days immobile and completely powerless to protect the woman he loved from a fate worse than death.

_Forgive me, Juliet. Please, forgive me._

Eventually, her cries faded and died, swallowed by the silence. But Caesar already knew that there would be no forgetting that sound- Juliet's anguish was seared deep into his core, a reminder of his failure that would haunt him to his dying breath.


	7. Aegri Somnia.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ruby questions her life choices, and our lord and saviour the Roll finally admits that he's not ready to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UGH MY FEELS OMG.
> 
> I can't draw to save my life and was disappointed by the lack of Kaiser Roll/Courier fan art on the interwebs. So, if 1) you know where I can find some, or 2) you wouldn't mind drawing these two human dumpster fires (for compensation, of course), I would love to hear from you. :)
> 
> Theme: [Heroes Fall](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CqNEUgeSD48) by Hidden Citizens & ESSA.

Though it took some time, Ruby quickly adjusted to her new role as a commanding officer's wife. Lanius allowed her to continue her lessons- for the time being, of course- stating it was Caesar's will that a woman of her station be as intelligent as she was pretty. And though the constant studying gave her eye-strain, as well as a few headaches of her own, she was grateful for any opportunity to escape her _wifely duties_.

Certainly, she hadn't been born for this life, and she often thought about running away. Maybe she'd plan her escape- steal what food and supplies she could in advance, create a distraction and leverage the chaos to her advantage... Or perhaps she'd just make a run for it while the others slept, leave all but her caps purse behind and disappear like a shadow in the dusk, just as she had after...

That awkward first kiss seemed so far away now. It was why she'd come back here, why she'd stayed... and why she'd done the one thing she swore she wouldn't. What had started as mutual admiration and respect had somehow shifted, become something deeper; without chems and booze to suppress her emotions, she was no longer in control. Even if she left this place, she'd be tethered to it forever, and things would never go back to the way they were.

She'd known since childhood that there was no sense forming fragile, complicated attachments to other humans- her parents' deaths had taught her that much. But she'd followed her heart instead of her head, and this was where giving a damn about someone other than herself had gotten her. If only she'd stuck to her original route and avoided Goodsprings altogether, she'd be rich and high, just as she'd planned: not married to one man, in love with another, and helpless to stop the world from crumbling around her.

She blinked rapidly and took a deep breath as she tried to focus on her work. But the words on the page all seemed to blur together as tears rolled down her cheeks, so she covered her face with a book and kept working until she could no longer focus. Then, while Vulpes wasn't looking, she slipped out of the room and made for the docks, fingers closed tightly around the inhaler of Jet in her closed fist. It was her calm in chaos, and she tried not to think of how disappointed Caesar would be, if he knew that she'd broken her promise.

When she reached the docks, she stared out over the camp. Everything was as it had been, virtually unchanged since the day she'd arrived- it was she who had shifted, her life torn apart and rearranged, just like America after atomic war. And, while it was considerably darker and colder than before, it had endured... and so would she, once Caesar was gone. She owed him that. 

Her mind made up, she glanced wistfully at the Jet in her hand and took a deep breath before flinging it into the water, where it made a fair-sized splash before disappearing into the irradiated depths forever.

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Meanwhile, in the throne room, Lucius paced around like a nervous dog. Between breaking up fights and keeping tension to a minimum, the Praetorians had their hands full; Caesar had fallen into a deep depression, and it seemed that he had all but lost the will to live after Juliet's marriage to Lanius. Maybe it was guilt, or regret- perhaps both. But things had taken a turn, and there was no doubt that it had to do with the redheaded courier whose absence and presence were equally noted.

He poked his head into the bedroom, then sat down in a nearby chair before offering some purified water and a MRE. Caesar ignored him at first, staring into space for a few minutes before finally making eye contact.

"Tell me, Lucius... what would you have done?"

Lucius shook his head, deciding to play it safe in case the wrong answer resulted in his own demise. "I don't know," he replied, erring on the side of caution. "Staring death in the face is no easy feat, I'm sure. But you did what was necessary."

Caesar frowned. "That's not what I meant, and you damn well know it. Lanius is a great warrior. He's an asshole, but he's loyal, and I'm sure he'll be a decent husband, in time. I have no doubts concerning Juliet's ability to lead, but that she's a woman... The men won't like this at all, but they won't fuck with her if she's their commander's wife. He'll protect her when I can't; it was- _is_ \- the only way."

Unsure of how to respond, Lucius simply nodded before settling on what sounded good. "I'm sure she understands that. Or she will, one day."

He dropped his eyes to the ground, and neither of them spoke for several minutes, but Caesar stared at the entrance as though he expected Juliet would appear if he willed it. "Have you seen her?"

"I haven't. But I can bring her here if-"

"No," Caesar replied, with a shake of his head. "It's better that she doesn't come. I don't want her to remember me like this."

Lucius nodded his understanding, then stood up to leave. This was a strangely unguarded moment, one that he couldn't, shouldn't, be present for, but he hadn't even made it to the archway when he heard Caesar's voice behind him.

"If I were a younger man, she would have been mine."

The guard stopped in his tracks and turned around before sitting back down in the chair he'd previously occupied. "What do you mean, _would have been?_ She lives to carry out your will, just like Lanius does. Wouldn't that be kind of the same thing?"

"Hardly," Caesar replied tersely. "The world is shit, and it's always been shit. When the headaches started, I knew there was something wrong with me; I was ready to die. But then, I heard about this courier, some little girl who'd been shot in the head and was terrorizing the NCR- she wanted revenge, and I needed someone with her access to the Strip, so I figured we could help each other... and we did, though not in the way either of us had planned."

He choked on the last word, cleverly disguising the break in his voice with a cough, in hopes that Lucius wouldn't notice. "You see," he continued. "She's young enough to be my granddaughter, but there was... something... between us that I couldn't ignore. The only thing I ever cared for was my Legion, but she changed that. She made me feel things I didn't know I could, and now... The world's still shit, but I would give anything for just one more year in it with her."

Lucius nodded, breath held, as he carefully considered his next words. He knew he should say something profound, thoughtful even. But, under the current circumstances, he came up empty- nothing he could say would change the events that had been set in motion.

"I'm sorry, Sir."

Caesar blinked. "So am I. But what's done is done. I just... I think you should go."

Out of respect, Lucius agreed and made his exit, promising himself that he'd keep Lanius in line, once Caesar was dead. As long as he remained at the Praetorians' helm, he could maintain a sense of order, and Juliet would be in the safest of hands.


	8. Totus Tuus.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A tender moment between these two dumpster fires before Kaiser Roll bites it next chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I started writing this, I was drawn to the challenge: taking a pair of antagonists with virtually no redeeming qualities and somehow making them sympathetic, as well as the formation of this intense bond between two characters who have no frame of reference for what romantic love is. 
> 
> This chapter was harder to write than I thought it would be. Please send help (and maybe some Jet for Ruby, if you've got extra lying around).
> 
> Themes: [A Time For Us](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hXzs74wk5c) by Arwan Virgothic and [Without You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uk4gglVO9GY) by Ursine Vulpine & Annaca.

It was late at night; the sun had slipped away hours ago, and noise from the training yard had quieted to a dull roar, but Caesar lay awake, staring at the ceiling. He wasn't sure how he knew, but he had a feeling that the next time he closed his eyes would be the last.

With the exception of Lucius, no one had been allowed in or out of the small room, which was filled with untouched food and various forms of tribute left by the soldiers who were still loyal. But it didn't matter, because all of it was worthless now: this was the most insidious threat his Legion had ever faced and, though they'd been pushed to the brink by the NCR and others, he had never imagined that he himself- rather, this thing in his head- would be their undoing.

He leaned back against the pillows and shut his eyes, waiting for the inevitable white light, or whatever it was people saw when they died. But nothing happened, and it only made him nervous: he was used to being in control, and not knowing was its own kind of hell- was there even such a thing? He wasn't sure, though he had a hard time believing that there was nothing on the other side. Maybe he should have taken matters into his own hands when he had the chance. But it was too late for that now.

The tent flap rustled, bringing him back to the present. Thinking that he might be in danger, he pulled himself into a sitting position and grabbed the spear that was propped against the wall beside his bed; as the silhouette in the archway stepped out of the shadows, a gleam of red caught his eye.

"Juliet? Am I dead already, or... ?"

She said nothing, but shook her head _no_ as she crossed the room and sat beside him on the mattress. Caesar dropped the spear and grabbed her arm, pulling her down into a kiss. She gasped in shock, but yielded to it, and he heard her sigh as his tongue slipped between her teeth. He had forgotten how good it felt to be close to her, but she wasn't his anymore; he'd seen to that when he'd asked her to marry Lanius, and-

_Shit._

It was his own damn fault, of course, though that knowledge brought little comfort. "I can't," he said, brushing a strand of red hair from her cheek as he withdrew from her and slumped back against the pillows. "You're a commanding officer's wife now. If Lanius finds you here, he'll kill you."

Juliet shrugged. "I don't care," she replied nonchalantly. "He'd be doing me a favour."

She put on a brave face, though her breath betrayed her as she moved closer. "I sent a team to that vault," she admitted, with the usual proud tilt of her head, as she held back a sob.. "The one near Nellis- I know I wasn't supposed to go there, so I had a bunch of recruits go in my place. No survivors, and no part for your machine thing. But _I_ didn't go myself, so I didn't _technically_ break any rules. I just... I had to try."

In that moment, she looked much older than her twenty-ish years, and Caesar only shook his head. He should have known that she would find a way to circumvent the rules- she always did, and it was one of the things he admired most about her. Unlike the other Legionaries, she wasn't afraid of him- threats and punishment would never stop her from doing what she wanted, and she'd keep Lanius on his toes once...

But he didn't want to think about that, a world in which one of them existed without the other. Neither of them did. Juliet was no stranger to death- she was strong, and she'd survive, though that didn't make it any easier.

"Stay with me," he insisted, one hand on her wrist, trying to sound braver than either of them felt. "If I never open my eyes again, I want you to be the last person I see."

Juliet nodded silently as a tear rolled down her face, though she bravely swatted it away with the back of her hand. "Shit," she choked, her voice broken as a fresh flow of tears spilled down her cheeks. "I'm sorry. I promised myself I wasn't going to cry, but I just... I can't... Fuck. I wish I'd never come here! If only we'd never met, none of this would be happening."

She was sobbing openly now, her breath coming in short, shallow gasps, and he moved to comfort her. She resisted, but only halfheartedly, eventually submitting to the gesture as she leaned against his chest and tucked her head under his chin. Her hair smelled like salt and sand and the desert air, and he planted a tender kiss on the top of her head, wishing vainly that his memories of her could transcend death. There might have been a time in which he remained stoic, unmoved by her vulnerability, but this was not it.

"Don't say that," he almost pleaded, drawing her closer. "Given the choice, I would rather go back ten years, set myself on fire, and take a flying leap off the Grand Canyon than live a hundred more years without knowing you. I just... I wish we had more time."

Juliet sighed wistfully. "So do I."

He pulled her into his lap, and one hand moved to her face, the other resting on the curve of her hip as he covered her mouth with his own. She trembled in his arms, and he felt her breath, her heartbeat, through her clothes as though she were an extension of himself. And, though she hesitated at first, she didn't stop him, instead letting herself fall forward into his arms as she crumbled beneath the weight of what ultimately lay ahead.

“I'm going to miss you,” he whispered, taking her small hand in his much-larger one and holding it against his cheek as he peered up at her like a small child. "In another life, perhaps we'll have forever. I can't give you that, but we still have tonight."

His voice faltered, and he hoped she wouldn't notice. But she did, of course, and she leaned forward, dropping a quick kiss on his forehead before resting her cheek against his. She was young and beautiful, with her whole life ahead of her, yet this was her punishment for being in the right place at the wrong time. And, while Caesar knew firsthand that life wasn't fair, it did nothing to lessen the guilt of dragging her into all of this.

"Here," she responded calmly, pain carving sharp lines into her pretty features as she removed her tunic, then his. "Let me take care of you."

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Outside, Lucius stood guard, watching the camp from the top of the hill. He had seen Juliet enter the tent, and he knew that Caesar didn't have much time left; it was his duty to protect them both, during these final moments.

He had only been in position for a short time when Lanius appeared, flanked by two guards. "Where's Juliet?" he demanded. "She left our tent yesterday morning, but Vulpes reports that he hasn't seen her. Do you have any idea where she might be?"

"No," he answered calmly, with a shake of his head. "She's not here, Sir. Perhaps try the docks, or even Cottonwood Cove. She's been spending quite a bit of time there lately, though it's possible that she may have returned home to Freeside or to one of the Searchlight caves. That's where I found her last time."

It was a fine, foolhardy bluff, though his current aim was to keep Lanius as far away from the tent as possible. If he even suspected that Juliet was nearby, he'd tear the place down looking for her, and he'd have her crucified if he knew what she was up to. Their marriage was one of convenience, a strategic move to ensure her safety. But had it been the only option? And what would he have done, had he been in Caesar's shoes?

Indeed, Juliet was brave, strong- she could easily hold her own against any man, even a hulking brute like Lanius. But it didn't matter now. She was his wife, and would remain so until one of them was cold in the ground... but she would never truly be his. She would stand with Caesar until he left the world, and then until the end of time itself; as long as she was tied to this place, she'd never forget him... And maybe that was the whole point.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Some hours later, Ruby and Caesar lay side by side in the darkness, the sheets a tangled mess around them. Ordinarily, this was the part where she'd disappear, make herself scarce until next time, but she'd stayed because she knew better- there would be no next time, no repeat performance of what had transpired here, and it hurt.

She knew she shouldn't have come here. If she could do it all over, she'd kill Benny instead of screwing him, deliver her platinum chip as planned, and get high as hell on Jet- the good stuff, not the bootleg shit Dixon peddled in front of the general store back home- before banging every hooker on the strip. Sex had gotten her into trouble more than once, but this wasn't just sex- this whole _feelings_ business complicated it, and what the hell was the point, if the other person was just going to die anyway?

The tent flap rustled, and Lucius appeared in the archway moments later. "Juliet," he said, with a nod of his head, as she scrambled to cover herself. "Pardon the interruption, but every guard in this camp is looking for you. I sent Lanius to Searchlight as a diversion, but you should probably make an appearance before he returns."

Caesar nodded. "Don't let me keep you," he whispered into her ear, his arm around her waist her only anchor to safety. "Go on and get some sleep, little one. You need your rest."

"No," Ruby replied stubbornly. "I'm not leaving you here."

She pressed her body closer to his, more for comfort than warmth, and he allowed it, for much the same reason. "I'm not giving you a choice, little one. If you aren't back in your tent by morning, Lanius is going to come looking for you, and he might just grant that death-wish of yours if he finds you like this. Lucius will see you out when you're ready."

She sighed, but did as she was told, and Lucius shielded his eyes to give her privacy as she dressed quietly. Once she was fully clothed, the guard handed her a stealth boy and guided her toward the tent flap with a firm hand. Caesar watched her go, and their eyes met briefly before she disappeared into thin air; her scent still lingered, all that remained of the little flame-haired courier who had transformed the world as he knew it, and an intense longing stirred deep in his chest as his entire body ached for hers.

_Is this what dying feels like?_

He must have said it out loud as well, because Lucius raised an eyebrow in confusion. "I don't know. Maybe just close your eyes and think peaceful thoughts. Easier said than done, I know, but overthinking won't do either of you any good."

 _No argument there_ , he thought to himself as he shut his eyes and imagined a very different ending to their story- one in which no one had to die, and he could give Juliet the forever she wanted, instead of forcing her into a loveless union with someone she hated. But he hadn't done it to hurt her: if anything, the opposite was true. Lanius had a terrible temper and would quickly tire of Juliet's youthful enthusiasm- her constant flouting of the rules and sarcastic wit, all the things Caesar considered her best qualities. But she'd put him in his place before, and she'd do it again, if it became necessary.

"Promise me something, Lucius," he whispered imploringly. "If the NCR wins at Hoover Dam, I'll be written in the annals of history as a monster- a dictator who enslaved millions of people, for his own amusement. And, while the opinions of the masses don't matter, I want Juliet to remember only that I loved her- more than I've ever loved my Legion, or myself, or anything else in this godforsaken wasteland. Can you do that?"

Lucius nodded. "I swear it on my life, Sir."

The guard extinguished the flames in the lanterns quickly, and the two men nodded at each other as Lucius made his exit, leaving Caesar alone with his thoughts yet again. He was no closer to knowing how much time he still had, but Juliet had forgiven him, and that was all that mattered.


	9. Finis Vitae...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For every happy ending, there are a thousand unhappy ones; this is one of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UGH IT HURTS MAKE IT STOP.
> 
> Theme: [Destiny](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibXxrYxWyTY) by Generdyn Music & Krigarè.

Dawn was breaking, and the sun rose over Fortification Hill, much as it did every morning. Somewhere overhead, a lone raven's cry echoed through the desert as fires crackled, training drums beat, and soldiers sparred with their fists and swords. At first glance, the day seemed perfectly ordinary, just as unremarkable as the ones that came before... only it wasn't.

Ruby stared into the blood-red sun, bleary-eyed and weak with hunger. She hadn't slept or eaten since leaving Caesar's tent the previous night; Lanius, of course, attributed her lack of appetite to illness or _the crimson tide_ , which made her want to slit his throat with his own damn blade. Fury burned in her core, twisting and aching until she thought she might vomit- she hated him, and everything he represented. He reminded her of everything she was about to lose, and she couldn't bring herself to look at him, even when he attempted to ply her with food.

"Here," he said, knocking the cigarette from between her fingers as he passed her a MRE. "Eat this, little one. If you don't eat, you'll never get better."

She glowered at him as she snatched the package out of his hand and tossed it into a nearby fire pit. "Maybe I don't want to. And _don't_ call me that again, or I'll cut your tongue out."

Lanius opened his mouth to say something, but thought better of it and marched off to join the other soldiers at the training grounds. Ruby watched his retreating form fade into the distance, sand scorching the soles of her feet as she stooped to recover her cigarette. But, before she could relight it, Lucius exited the tent and rested a firm hand on her shoulder, by way of greeting.

"Juliet," he said solemnly, his mouth drooping just enough that she knew what he was about to say. "It's time."

She nodded and followed him into the tent, where they were met by Siri and a handful of guards. Upon seeing Lucius, they moved aside to let the pair through; Caesar looked up at them from his place on the bed and dismissed the entourage with a wave of his hand. "Leave us," he ordered, his voice a shadow of itself. "There's nothing more you can do for me anyhow."

The others nodded and filed out of the tent in an orderly line. Once they were gone, Lucius nudged Ruby ahead; his job complete, he remained in place as she ran across the room and dropped to her knees at Caesar's side. "No," she commanded, though her voice shook with every word. "You're not dying on me. There _has_ to be something, some way... If there's even the slightest chance that we-

Unable to finish the sentence, she bowed her head and sighed, her lower lip trembling as she bit back tears. If all this power wasn't enough to save Caesar from certain death, what good was any of it?

"It's too late for that," he replied calmly, knuckles resting against her cheek. "We can't stop it, or change its course. But this- you and me- has been worth it. Just know that, if I could do all of this over again, I would."

The audible tremor in his voice made Ruby wish that she were a medic, or some kind of healer, with the power to make all of this disappear. To cheat death would surely carry weight with the others, but the part she cared most about was sparing the only person she'd ever cared about the suffering that surely awaited.

At that moment, a gust of wind blew the tent flap open briefly, and Caesar's face shifted as he screwed his eyes shut. "Goddamned lights," he muttered, more to himself than to her. "At least there won't be any of those where I'm going. But listen to me, little one... _My_ little one. I want you to know that I-"

But he never finished the sentence. Instead, he flopped back against the pillows like a rag doll, fingers closed around Ruby's wrist, and stared absently at the ceiling. He went completely silent for a moment, then sat up and shook his head as one hand searched awkwardly for hers.

"Juliet, I... I can't see."

It was the first time she'd heard fear in his voice, the same fear that raced up her own spine as she recalled the dream she'd had: her and Caesar, under the tarps that had housed her parents' bodies, one blind and the other cleaved in two. She hadn't known what it meant at the time, but the symbolism was no longer lost on her. 

"I'm here," she whispered , her throat constricting with every syllable. "I'm not going anywhere, and neither are you. Everything's gonna be fine."

The sand beneath her knees was hot and sharp, every grain slicing into her skin like glass. But she didn't care; the hours of torturous uncertainty had become mere minutes, so she remained in her spot on the ground and leaned forward, resting her head against his chest. His arms were around her in an instant, and the tears came, unbidden. Her entire body shook with the force of them, but at least he wouldn't see her cry.

"I tried," she sniffed mournfully. "It wasn't supposed to end like this. I've failed you, Cae-"

"Edward," he corrected, holding her hand over his heart as his words sliced cleanly through hers. "Call me Edward."

Stunned by the revelation, Ruby froze like a wild animal at gunpoint. Her mouth hung open in a disbelieving _o_ for a moment before she remembered her manners and dutifully closed it, then remembered that he couldn't see her anyway and swallowed over the sob that pressed against her lips.

"It's Ruby," she choked out, barely holding back tears. "My name is Ruby."

Her throat was so dry that the words stuck there, and she wasn't sure whether he'd heard her or not- there was certainly no indication that he had. But, then again, he'd always been good at keeping his cards carefully hidden- if he _had_ heard her, then refusing to acknowledge as much meant that her secret was safe and that he'd take it to his grave. 

A pained whimper broke through his stoic facade as he squeezed his eyes shut, and Ruby pulled a vial of Med-X- her last one, which she'd hung onto for this exact reason- from her pack, injecting the whole thing into his left arm. Grief coiled in her lungs, its icy fist clenched in her belly as her insides twisted with dread; she didn't feel brave, but he needed her to be. So she dropped a tender kiss on his forehead and held him as his body shivered against hers- too warm to be dead, too cold to be alive.

"No," she pleaded, tears biting the corners of her eyelids, as she tried to keep a straight face. "Don't go, I- _I love you_."

She didn't know what the words meant, only that they felt right, and they tumbled out of her mouth before she could stop herself. Caesar didn't answer, though the corners of his mouth turned upward just slightly as his fingers closed around hers. The light faded from his eyes, and she watched, paralyzed, as they flickered shut one last time.

Finally, it was over. Too numb to move, or even breathe, Ruby stared at the ceiling, still holding his hand as it grew cold in hers. Her eyes burned with suppressed tears and sleeplessness, and she wished that she, too, could just fall asleep and never wake up. She couldn't face Lanius and his men, though anything her _husband_ could do to her wouldn't hurt as much now. She needed to get rid of him. But that was a plan for another day.


	10. ... Sed Non Amoris.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caesar's funeral; also, good guy Lucius steps in as Ruby's father figure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If someone had told me a year ago that Caesar dying would make me sad, I'd have laughed in their faces. Time to crawl under a rock and die.
> 
> This chapter and the next were originally one long block of text, so I split them up. 
> 
> Themes: [After You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlkpJiBEuvc) by Shelley Harland & [Immortalized](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s07O0C3Ssko) by Keeley Bumford.

_"Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. This is Mr. New Vegas... This just in: we have unconfirmed reports that Caesar has died in his base camp after a failed surgery, performed by an unknown- and possibly unqualified- surgeon. Once again, Caesar, dead: a shocking turn of events, whose impact is-"_

Ruby switched off her Pip-Boy radio and sighed. She didn't need some goddamn AI reminding her of everything she'd lost- this tent, the camp, and everything in them were doing a fine job of that on their own. And, though she'd been alone for most of her life, nothing could have prepared her for true loneliness- the anguish that burned deep in her gut like wildfire, swallowing everything it touched as it grew bigger. Lucius had told her to seek him out if she needed anything, but she didn't want to bother him; he had his own grief to contend with, after all.

Outside, plumes of smoke billowed high in the sky, so thick and black that they nearly obscured the sun. Every flag in the camp had been painstakingly lowered to half-mast, which Ruby had seen to herself; she, Lanius, and the entire Praetorian guard wore black togas, instead of their usual red. And, since everyone else had things to do, she'd been permitted to oversee the burial preparations for _science reasons_.

Siri noted the time of death in her records before she began preparing Caesar's body for the funeral. She was a woman of science, quick and efficient, but it was evident that she had no love for her captors' leader- a feeling that, just a short time ago, Ruby would have understood, since it would have been the same as asking her to kiss and make up with Dennis Crocker... which she'd have gladly done, if it would bring Caesar back. 

"Be careful," the medic warned grimly, as she went about her task. "As bad as Caesar was, Lanius is worse- he's a brutal man, who enjoys inflicting pain, and I'm afraid for the women. I never thought I'd say this, but I wish I could bring Caesar back, if only to keep that husband of yours in line. Just don't tell anyone I said that."

Silently, Ruby agreed, though she'd have brought him back for different reasons. Just last night, they'd occupied this space together and, now, he was gone- erased from existence, like those chem-induced dreams that felt real enough to touch in the moment, but were little more than hazy figments when she woke. All that remained was this shell, the body he'd left behind, and the knowledge that everything she'd never known she wanted had eluded her.

"I won't," she replied sharply, fixing the other woman with a death stare. "But speak his name where I can hear you, and I'll rip your tongue out through your ass."

Of course, she'd been referring to Caesar, not Lanius. Her husband was indeed a brute, and she hated him as much as anyone- getting rid of him would be her crowning achievement. But Siri was none the wiser, too engrossed in her work to notice as Ruby approached Caesar's body and slipped the ring off his right hand. It was too big for any of her fingers and adding it to the collection around her neck would draw unwanted attention from her husband. She'd figure out what to do with it later. But, for the time being, she dropped it into the pocket of her tunic- a final secret between them that no one would ever know.

Once Caesar's body had been fully dressed, Siri looked to her for approval. Ruby nodded and placed a gold coin in his mouth- safe passage to the afterlife- before following Lucius and the Praetorians, who carried the body out to the makeshift pyre in the courtyard. The other officers' wives wept, though whether out of mourning or relief was unknown- she wanted to scream too, but her face remained stoic, even as Lanius handed her a torch and ordered her to set the pile of brush ablaze.

Shaking, she did as she was told, and she had to look away as the torch tumbled from her trembling hands. The pyre ignited on contact, smoke filling her eyes and throat, and she stepped back, forcing herself to watch it burn. She made brief eye contact with Lucius over the roaring flames, and she was sure he saw the exact moment her heart shattered, because she saw his do the same. He'd lived his entire life in Caesar's service- hell, he knew nothing else- and guarded their secret to the very end; he was the reason she had been present for Caesar's final moments, and she now owed him a complicated debt that all the caps in Vegas could never repay.

She waited until Lanius was distracted before disappearing into the crowd, slipping through the shadows until she ended up back at Caesar's tent. No one would think to look for her there. So she eased the flap open and stepped inside, her eyes moving around the room as though checking for monsters in the dark. Everything was exactly as it had always been, only he wasn't there, and his absence hung overhead like a ghost- regardless of where she ended up, she'd never outrun the memories that chained her to this place.

A shiver raced up her spine, and she gulped back a sob so intense that her entire body shook with the force of it, as she finally let the tears fall freely. Each one burned her skin, streaking through the dust and ash that covered her face in a grey mask of anguish, and she felt just as empty as the Searchlight caves- the same ones she'd sought refuge in, back when she'd fled the camp after that awkward first kiss. She hadn't expected it to lead anywhere, but it had, and her whole world had turned on its head, all because of some knee-jerk reaction to one of her sob stories. If only she'd never gotten into that scrap, she'd never have been in the damn tent or told him about her parents...

"I thought I might find you here."

Lucius. Of course he'd know her whereabouts- hell, he'd probably expected her to turn up before she herself even knew that she would. But he kept his distance, a courtesy she had always been grateful for- especially now that he was her last link to all that had transpired between these four walls. She didn't need any more reminders of what she'd lost, though she suspected he already knew that.

"Don't tell Lanius," she pleaded, those three words the only ones that would form on her lips, though she knew she couldn't stop him from doing just that. Lucius' loyalty had been to Caesar, not her, and his new allegiance was to her husband; he owed her nothing. But she was surprised when he agreed.

"I won't," he promised, sneaking a quick glance outside- no doubt Lanius had sent him here and was awaiting a report. "Your closeness may have been a secret, but he loved you, and that love is why I promised I'd keep you safe. So take all the time you need, my dear... She's not here, men- keep looking!"

Their eyes met briefly, but Ruby quickly turned her head and looked away as Lucius disappeared without another backward glance.


	11. Invictus Maneo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Though Ruby doesn't know it yet, our lord and saviour The Roll has one last surprise up his sleeve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Wow, Lanius is an asshole. I'm shocked." -no one ever
> 
>  _Invictus maneo_ : I remain undefeated.
> 
> Theme: [I'm Dangerous](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfl9MuN_bN8) by The Everlove.

In the days following the mourning period, the upcoming clash with the NCR at Hoover Dam took precedence, and all other projects were abandoned, in order to reallocate resources to the war effort. Her lessons suspended indefinitely, Ruby divided her time between the clinic, learning basic first aid from Siri, and comparing notes with Vulpes on the best ways to kill people quietly... both of which would be useful, when it came to plotting her husband's untimely demise. She hadn't seen Lucius since the day of Caesar's cremation, so she was surprised when he approached her as she was leaving the mess hall.

"Juliet," he said, inclining his head in her direction and offering her the tattered piece of parchment he now held. "I found this with some of the Caesar's belongings, and I thought you should have it. If Lanius ever got his hands on it, he... You'll want to sit down for this, my dear. And you should probably wait until you're alone before you, uh, open it."

She nodded, retreating to the privacy of Siri's clinic as he disappeared into the crowd. After checking to make sure that no one had followed her, she unfolded the note and read it.

_Juliet- my little one, my desert flower,_

_If you're reading this, it means you're still alive, just like I knew you would be. You were always resourceful, and you'll go on to achieve greatness... My only regret is that I won't be there to see it with my own eyes._

_What I'm about to tell you should not come as a shock: you have served me, and my Legion, well, and I am in your debt- one that caps and coins alone can never repay. You've tipped the scales in our favour and, as promised, the responsibility of leading these men into battle is now yours: when Lanius succeeds me as the new Caesar, you will assume his place as Legate. You are the first, and only, woman in our history to hold such an important position, and I trust that the honour is not lost on you._

_I shouldn't have to tell you all the reasons I chose you, as I'd surely run out of paper before I listed them all. Lanius is fortunate to have you by his side- in the short time we've known each other, I've watched you grow into a model soldier, and your husband can only hope to be half the man you are, if he's lucky._

_For years after my first failure at the Dam, I asked Mars for answers. And, if he had told me then that those answers would come in the form of a little girl from Freeside, I'd have laughed in his face. But here we are, Juliet- I'm not very good at putting these things into words, though I want you to know that I regret nothing: however short it may have been, our time together was precious, and may the strange, beautiful things you awakened in me remain with you for the rest of your days._

_Soon, I'll be gone from this world. But, though my body is no longer here, I will live forever in your heart._

_Yours,_  
_Edward_

Breathing hard, Ruby folded the letter and tucked it into her pocket, alongside Caesar's ring. She knew that she should have been happy, ecstatic even, at the news- just weeks ago, she'd have been thrilled that he had considered her skilled enough, important enough, to serve at the head of his Legion. But now, he was gone, and the only thing she felt was emptiness, once again.

She'd spent years chasing ghosts- her parents' deaths had left a void she'd filled with drugs and sex and violence, hoping that one of those things might bring her closure. But the only thing that ever accomplished that was what she and Caesar had shared- she'd felt vindicated somehow, as though all the suffering she'd endured over the years had finally served a purpose. And, in its own, twisted way, perhaps it had. 

An image of the dream she'd had- her naked body, corpse-white, but for the gaping wound where her heart had been ripped from her chest- flashed before her eyes, and she winced at the memory. Bullet wounds, bruises, and broken bones could all be mended, chem addictions cured, but no amount of stimpaks would ever numb the pain she now felt. 

Of course, her new role was another story. She had always been a lone wolf and had no experience leading a group, let alone one the Legion's size; she was fond of having few commitments, no responsibility to anyone but herself, and accepting the title meant answering to her brute of a husband... until he mysteriously died, at least. But Caesar's will was absolute- if he had chosen her for the job, it meant that she had proven herself enough to earn his trust, and she would honour that. 

So she composed herself, then touched her fingers to her lips and patted the ring in her pocket, before heading out to meet the others.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On the eve of battle, Ruby joined Lanius and his men in the courtyard for the official announcement of her husband's ordination. He didn't treat her any differently than usual, which meant he had no idea about the note Lucius had brought her. And, the less he knew, the better.

"On this day," Vulpes read aloud from a tattered sheet of parchment, similar to the one in Ruby's pocket. "I name Legatus Lanius my successor, therefore he shall assume my title and all responsibilities associated therewith. Beside him, his wife, the _laurifer gladiatrix_ Juliet of Freeside, will assume his previous role as- wait, this can't be right."

Lanius peered at it and scowled. "No," he said, shaking his head determinedly. "This won't stand, and it only confirms my suspicions that the Caesar's mental state was compromised by his illness. Little girls have no business playing at war, and they certainly don't lead. Not in my Legion."

He peered down his nose at Ruby, expecting her to shrink beneath his gaze. But she didn't, instead standing taller and braver than she had been just moments ago. "I accept."

"But you can't. You're a woman, and your place is-"

"My place is exactly the same as during our first meeting. Need I remind you how that ended?"

As she said it, Lucius stood and rested a firm hand on Ruby's shoulder. "Her place is here," he said, staring Lanius in the eye. "It may seem unusual, but it is Caesar's will. And, if it is Caesar's will that a woman should lead us, then I will stand behind her until my death."

"Enough, Lucius," Lanius responded, annoyed this time. "Caesar's will doesn't matter. He's dead, and you will be too, if you don't put this nonsense to rest. And you, Juliet, need to learn your place: Caesar may have tolerated your flagrant disregard for our rules, though I assure you that I will not be such an easy mark. Even one toe out of line, and I'll have you executed."

Ruby glared daggers at him. "Someone's jealous," she taunted, exchanging glances with Lucius, who visibly cringed. "It would seem that Caesar knew, as does everyone gathered here, that I'm a better leader than you'll ever be."

Lanius said nothing, though his eyes flashed with a murderous rage behind his mask. Ruby stood her ground, Lucius' hand still on her shoulder, and others began to stand, in a show of support: Siri and Vulpes, some of the Praetorians, and a handful of her former classmates- including Flavius, who used to mock her-all moved behind her, in a show of support, and a few even started shouting her name. It started in the back, but quickly rumbled forward until everyone but Lanius himself was chanting it at the top of their lungs.

"Well, then," she continued, eyes glinting with satisfaction as they swept over the assembled crowd. "It is done, dear husband. _Invictus maneo_."

Her mouth slanted briefly, the closest thing to a smile that she'd been able to muster since Caesar's death. Anguish flickered deep in her stomach, but touching the ring in her pocket seemed to calm her, somehow. It was as though he was still here, and she let out a shaky breath, swiping at a single tear that slithered down her cheek. Of course she knew better, that death was permanent and that there was no coming back from it. But, if he were alive, he'd be damn proud of her.

"Fine." Lanius replied, without conviction. "You're lucky that the Caesar was so fond of you. I'm not sure why, but his favour is the only reason I haven't thrown you to the dogs. So get out of here and, unless you hate living, _don't_ screw this up."

"I won't let you down. I promise."

Once again, the words were intended for Caesar, not Lanius. But her husband was too self-absorbed to notice, and they parted ways, his gold armour gleaming beneath the light of the dying Vegas sun. But all the armour in the world wouldn't protect him from what she had planned and, though he didn't know it yet, he'd be dead by morning.


	12. Veni, Vidi, Vici.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lanius gets Arya Starked by Ruby, and the Legion heads off to war.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a couple more chapters to wrap things up... You've been a wonderful audience. :)
> 
> I had to include a nod to the whole 'Legion-ear' thing (when you talk to Private Sexton at Forlorn Hope) because I find it amusing.
> 
> Theme: [Hunt You Down](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwauJcLXRm8) by Ruby Friedman.

It was still dark out when Ruby woke. All was quiet, and the men in the Legate's Camp slept on, in silent anticipation- the calm before the storm, and exactly what she wanted.

She set about preparing the poison, according to Siri's instructions- combine irradiated water, two jalapeno poppers, Sunset Sarsparilla, and an entire sac of cazador venom in a pot, boil until thick. No one knew that she planned to kill her husband before the battle, and they'd never trace it to her anyway- as long as they stayed in the tent and made no noise, they'd probably just assume that he'd fallen in combat- which wasn't completely untrue, since she had already bested him in the arena. But this would be the final nail in the proverbial coffin and, after they beat the NCR at the Dam, she'd be free of him forever.

Of course, the outcome of the battle was still undecided, as there were too many variables hanging in the balance. But Ruby already knew that she had no choice but to win: in accepting her new role, she had promised Caesar that she would. And she would kill any number of people, including Lanius, to ensure it happened. She and the Legion- _her_ Legion- would be better off without him anyway, and the survivors of the coming war would be able to start over at last.

But now was not the time for speculation- too long, and her concoction would lose its potency. So she poked her head out of the tent and took stock of her surroundings, then dipped her blade into the poison before heading out into the camp, making sure that no one saw her leave. But she had only made it as far as the training yard when one of the guards approached her. 

"Lady Legate," he said, by way of greeting. "Your husband requests your presence in the war tent. He hasn't given me any details, though I imagine he'll discuss those with you when you arrive."

Here was her window of opportunity. "I was just on my way."

She arrived at the war tent, peeling back the flap as she let herself inside. The smell of blood hit her like a frag grenade and, when Lanius turned to face her, he was covered in it: his gold breastplate was splattered in flecks of red, and the pile of bodies on his right told her that he'd been sacrificing slaves to Mars- another fun tidbit she'd picked up from her lessons with Vulpes. For a moment, she was offended that he hadn't asked her to join in, but she quickly remembered that it was him she'd be sacrificing, and her annoyance disappeared.

"Finally," he said, staring down at her. "Mars has accepted my sacrifices and unleashes me. The slaughter begins, then."

Ruby nodded, fingers closed around the knife concealed in the folds of her red toga. "I'm ready. What needs to be done?"

Lanius straightened, drawing himself to his full height- doing so also exposed the hollow of his throat, unprotected by his mask or armour. If she was fast enough, or he was distracted, she could take advantage of the opening to plunge the knife deep into its target. "Very well," he continued proudly- arrogantly, even. "Even now, you aren't what I expected. When Caesar told me he'd hired a courier for this task, I thought he was delusional... but you are messenger and message both, it would seem."

The nod to her humble beginnings as a courier was obviously intended as a dig at her, but she ignored him, and he kept going. "It is time," he went on, gesturing to the strategy table in the centre of the tent. "My Legionaries are ready to attack. And, while you may be the new Legate, it is my command that they answer."

"Fine," she answered. "I can work with that, as long as your men don't get in my way."

Lanius grunted something of a response. "As you say, Courier," he agreed, though his voice dripped with disdain. "But now is not the time for petty grievances, and any animosities between us can be settled once the war is won. In any event, the Son of Mars has granted me the name Lanius, and the time has come to serve him once more."

This seemed to be the only thing they had ever agreed on thus far, as she figured that _Son of Mars_ referred to Caesar. He had taken her under his wing, transformed her into something more than herself, and would always have her loyalty- how could he not be descended from the gods, if not one himself?

Lanius motioned for her to join him in front of the table, and she waited for the right moment to strike. "So," she ventured, pointing at a nearby map. "Why do they call you Lanius, anyway? I know it means _butcher_ , but how did you-"

"Impressive," he interjected. "Caesar has taught you well. _Lanius_ does, in fact, mean _butcher_ in Latin, and I was granted the name after proving myself in several battles. Perhaps, after today, you too will earn yourself a new name."

He droned on for a few minutes about the NCR, how to best use their tactics against them. But Ruby stared intently at his exposed neck, like a sniper zeroing in on her target as she waited for an opening. He would never see this coming, and it would be over before he even realized what had happened. She was running out of time and would need to act soon, if she hoped for her plan to work.

"And so, you see," he concluded, stabbing a knife into the map on the wall. "Our warriors will wash over them in a tide of blood- severing arms before they can attack, legs before they can run, and heads before they can pray. Mars' eyes are upon you, Legate- do not fail him, or me."

"Trust me," she said, without emotion. "I won't.

As she said it, Lanius turned his eyes skyward, and Ruby took advantage of the distraction, burying her poisoned dagger deep into the hollow of his throat. His eyes widened, then glazed over, behind the mask, and he briefly grabbed his neck before dropping to the ground. Blood bubbled from the wound she'd made as she gazed mockingly down at him, a sadistic role reversal- how many times had he looked down at her the same way?

"Mars has accepted my sacrifice and unleashes me."

Her work done, Ruby pulled Caesar's ring from her pocket and added it to the collection around her neck. She then cut off Lanius' right ear as a trophy- _confirm the kill_ , just as Caesar would have asked her to. And, once the array of knickknacks was safely around her neck again, she exited the tent, a swell of pride in her chest as she headed to the training yard to rally the troops for war.


	13. Pulvis et Umbra Sumus.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Kings are dead... Long live the Queen!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to miss this little story when it's done.
> 
> Theme: [Bad](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Inerf4ggoaU) by Royale Deluxe.

_And so the Courier, who had cheated death in the cemetery outside Goodsprings, cheated death once again, and the Mojave Wasteland was forever changed._

_The Legion marched toward Hoover Dam with the help of one who was as brutal and merciless as the worst of them: The Courier. But, though they fought fiercely and without mercy, Ruby- Juliet, or The Little Legate, as she was later known- and her men were no match for their more experienced opponents. The New California Republic celebrated its second victory at Hoover Dam, establishing definitive control over the region. Soon after, they negotiated terms to annex The Strip, Freeside, and many surrounding communities._

_Most of the Legionaries were killed or imprisoned, and General Oliver offered the survivors safe passage out of the Mojave, on the condition that their Legate surrender. When Juliet refused, he ordered his men to bring him her head, in exchange for a caps reward, but the bounty was never claimed._

_Juliet, along with Siri, Vulpes, and a handful of recruits, managed to flee the scene, though Lucius was separated from the group during their escape. His body was never found, and neither was Lanius, whose fate remained a mystery. Most assumed that he fell in battle, and Juliet did not correct them. She never told anyone what happened in the war tent, and would take her secret to the grave._

_The survivors ran east, out of the NCR's reach, until they ended up in a pre-war amusement park near the Commonwealth. They were soon divided by infighting and splintered into three factions, which absorbed the raider gangs who called the park home; Juliet herself went on to defeat their overboss in combat, which left her in command of three squabbling tribes. The Mojave, meanwhile, had entirely fallen under the NCR's banner, and the Legion died with its leader._

_And so the Courier's road came to an end... for now. In the new world of the Mojave Wasteland, fighting continued- blood was spilled, and many lived and died, just as they had in the Old World._

_Because war... War never changes._


	14. Epilogus.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A neat-ish ending, tied up with a bow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's all, folks!
> 
> I definitely plan on writing more of these two garbage humans. Ruby and Caesar are both fascinating characters, and telling their story has been so much fun that I will definitely revisit their weird-but-wonderful relationship. :) 
> 
> Theme: [Ain't No Sunshine](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgEleNaHdSk) by J2 & Alih Jey.

####  Twenty years later...

It was late at night, the sky blacker than a grave. But, for the first time in centuries, Nuka World sparkled with life, lit up in an image of its pre-war glory. It looked just like the Strip, paradise ripe for the picking, with bright lights and all the security anyone could ever want or need.

Ruby stared down at the park, surveying her kingdom from her position on the power plant roof. Securing the place had been a hell of a slog- between infighting, dissent, and a plot to overthrow her, she was finally in control of the park. She lorded over the population as Mr. House had the Strip and, like Caesar, annihilated the identities of the groups she'd absorbed during her takeover, killing anyone who resisted. And, while it had taken years for the dust to settle, the gamble had paid off and Nuka World was hers at last.

Behind her, a young man emerged from inside the plant. "Mother."

"Edward."

Her son was like her in nearly every way. He had the same deep blue eyes, shock of red hair, and insatiable thirst for blood as she did, leaving no guesses as to who his mother was. But no one, not even Ruby herself, knew who her child's father had been- perhaps she would never know, though she liked to imagine that Caesar was still with her, in a way.

"It's getting late, Edward. You should rest." 

He nodded. "I will. But can you tell me that story again? The one about the first Caesar?"

Ruby's heart clenched painfully in her chest, but she agreed. "Well," she ventured, touching the ring around her neck as if to draw strength from it. "The first Caesar was a great man- indomitable to the end. We didn't know each other well, but I remember that he was in love with a servant girl- a young slave around your age. Her name was Ruby."

Of course, she'd only ever told him an edited version of events- it made the story easier to tell. And, if the devil was in the details, the use of her name was one such devil she'd left in. She'd gone by Juliet for several years now, and not even the survivors of the disastrous second battle knew what her real name was, or wasn't. Still, she was unwilling to risk anyone finding out the truth about her and Caesar... and, by extension, the degree to which she'd been involved in their catastrophic loss at Hoover Dam.

"I see," he replied. 'What happened to her?"

"No one really knows. But, after he died, she just... disappeared. Some say that she fled into the wastes, others that she died with him."

It wasn't a complete lie, since a part of her _had_ died that day. Drawing breath did not constitute being alive- only the illusion of it.

"Still," she added, almost wistfully. "Regardless of what really happened, he loved her... and she loved him. And that's what matters, in the end."

Edward's eyes slitted in the darkness, emotionless but calculating... as though he knew something she didn't. "Did you love my father?"

She had seen that look before, though she couldn't quite place it, and her stomach fluttered as she touched Caesar's ring again. "Edward, listen to me," she said, avoiding the question, just in case her gut instinct was wrong. "There will soon come a day that you will take a wife, or a husband. And it doesn't matter if that person is young or old, man or woman, soldier, profligate, or raider; I only care that she- or he- loves and respects you. That's all I ask."

He nodded again, and she covered his hand with her own as the two of them gazed out into the star-studded sky. Silence hung between them for a moment, but Ruby suddenly reached out and fiercely hugged her son with all the love she was capable of. "You're a good boy, Edward," she said. "Your father would be proud of you, if he could see you now. You'll be a great leader one day- perhaps even the new Caesar."

He looked confused for a moment. "I thought we did away with that title. The Legion doesn't even exist anymore; why would we-"

"A temporary setback, my dear," she cut in, her own eyes narrowing as she glanced out at the wasteland that was Nuka World. "As long as I breathe, the Legion exists, and I am its Legate. The Republic stole my home, my memories... the man I loved; they took everything from me. But we'll take it back one day, even if we have to pry it from their cold, dead hands."

**Author's Note:**

> Playlist, part 2:
> 
> Ruby's theme: [It's a Sin](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PP7IxnP5Wik) by Hidden Citizens.
> 
> Ciara, [Paint It Black](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYPWxymohWs)  
> Evanescence, [End of the Dream](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQ5iuREPokw) (Synthesis version)  
> Generdyn, [Let It Burn](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7-Hx-CqWh0) (ft. Ruth Simard)  
> Leah, [Alpha et Omega](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iY3il0wMiRE)  
> Les Friction, [I Remember](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_ziCTLjoVo) (ft. Emily Valentine)  
> Nathan Wagner, [Lonely](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vzMmfQlBH4)  
> Summer Kennedy, [Bad Things](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84EEjgSEOFM)  
> Valerie Broussard, [A Little Wicked](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46rUBCewhxY)  
> Weekend Revolution & Avena Savage, [Save Me](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcTmKM8G6QA)  
> Weekend Revolution & Kimera Morell, [Don't Look Down](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lshMlb-w8k0)  
> Within Temptation, [Raise Your Banner](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZrMGGMNTKa8) and [The Reckoning](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7sOZ_TFUXg)


End file.
